One bedtime a couple of weeks ago I found something in the newspaper that really drew my attention – I didn’t know that men still wore them – and I passed it over to Chris. My grumpy half was nearly asleep (well, it was past midnight) and, with some irritation, he threw the newspaper onto the floor. “If you don’t want one you don’t have to have one!” I said, almost to myself and, eventually, after several minutes of giggling, I went to sleep.

In the morning Chris was his good humoured self again, so much so that he awakened me with peals of laughter. He was sat up in bed with the newspaper in his hands…

“Treat yourself… or the one you love… to a comfy nights sleep,” he read out between guffaws.

I’ve been thinking about that male model ever since. What induced him to accept the job? Had he been furloughed from his normal job and his wife, perhaps working from home, couldn’t stick him being around the house during Lockdown? Was it she who had suggested that he take up an artistic line of work in the interim? Imagine, if you will, a little scenario that may have been something akin to the truth….

“Mum,” begins the middle-aged man on his phone.

“Any news Richard?” his mother sounds excited.

“Yes, it’s all happened rather fast. Cynthia only sent off the digital photos of me on Wednesday and I’ve just heard back.”

“Oh, Richard, how wonderful! And it’s only Friday today! They must think you’re handsome. I always said you should have gone into television. How thrilling! Have they offered you a photo shoot?”

“No, Mum, they don’t tell you that you’re handsome – there must be a lot of good looking younger guys out there. And they are just the agents showing the photos of people on their books to the clients. But… I have been offered a job for next week.”

“Is it something glamorous? Will you be on TV?”

“No, no, Mum, I’m not an actor, but they want me for a photo shoot for an advert. It will be in the Daily Express.”

“Really? Oh gosh, how fantastic! I’m so proud of you Ricky. Do you know what you’ll be advertising?”

“No, they were a bit vague when I asked. They just said it was men’s nightwear. To be honest, I’m a bit worried that I’ll have to bare my chest. I’m not as muscly or as trim as I was.”

“Don’t worry, they’ll probably have special lighting Darling.”

The male model didn’t have to worry on that score after all, and the lighting genius wasn’t called in for his expertise… He didn’t have to bare his chest…

No wonder the agents were a bit vague….