Cold Comfort

To think that just a couple of weeks ago I was sweltering in the Tropical Dome at the Botanical Gardens, Brisbane; now there’s a place I would like to be right now – warm damp air on warm, damp, wrinkle-free and silky skin. No goose-bumps, no hunching of shoulders around the ears, no need for socks, trousers, jumpers or coats…

The central heating is on. I’m wearing fleecy track bottoms, a sporty top (you have to look the part to feel the part – all part of my new Slimming World healthy living plan), a soft pink cardigan and a scarf, doubled. You might imagine that I should be warm but, no, my nose and hands are frozen. Little wonder that English people are reputed to have good skin – they spend several months of the year in cryogenic suspension. Cold comfort!

My tiny hand was frozen enough, even before placing it under the cold tap. My hand recoiled, my shoulders went up.

“Better than warm water from the cold tap – no need to keep it in the fridge,” Chris laughed.

I winced at mention of the word “fridge”. Warm water out of the cold tap sounded most appealing, likewise a swimming pool or spa heated by the sun; a sheet covering, or not, at nighttime – such bliss.

Last night I spent another night alone in our bedroom with two heaters turned on; Chris spent another night in an upstairs bedroom – no wish to spread his cold – although I had a sore throat myself. I’m fighting it (not fighting fit).

I lay in bed at four in the morning, fighting it with positive thinking, then thinking about two more stories for the new book, started but not revisited in such a long time. For some reason my subconscious self stirred me to think about Alexei the French Russian with the poet face, who taught French at the Grammar School long ago; who played gypsy guitar music and who could have been “the one”… Why did he hang himself in his forties? Could I have prevented him? No, not “the one” but I still think of him and wonder, and mourn, especially at four in the morning.

In the cold light of day Hurricane Imogen had abated; the rain had stopped but the wind whipped up the spume on the crests of the waves as they rolled in to shore. Imogen wasn’t as aggressive as Hurricane Henry, whom she had followed, but still she had a lashing tongue. Coming inside from the terrace I shivered. I would stay in and nurse my throat – maybe even stop it from progressing. No gym sessions today. There’s plenty of time until Thursday night – Slimming World group night. Do you know that there are hundreds of free foods to eat on the Slimming World Easy Plan? Cold comfort – I don’t want to eat any of them. What I wouldn’t give for a nice piece of deep-fried cod in unctuous crisp batter!

If You Follow Me… (Some Jokes From Oz)

All the way from Brisbane…

 

It Don’t Add Up

Literacy and numeracy are the issues that employers are most concerned about. You might of guessed but did you know that four out of three people today struggle with basic maths?

 

Not so Tweet!

A good friend of mine who had recently succumbed to pressure from his kids, and all his old pals (including me!), to become computer literate has taken to the Internet like a duck to water. Who’d have thought that dear old Molesworth would actually enjoy surfing the net? Not only does he have the most expensive modern Mac computer, a tablet and an Ipad, he also has the latest Samsung Galaxy Smartphone.

Did I hear you ask if he knows how to use them? I’ll say! In fact, in next to no time he has developed something of a problem. Only yesterday I bumped into him in Oxford Street (he had his head down, looking at his Smartphone) and I laughed.

“It’s not funny,” old Molesworth had an air of misery about him even greater than I could recall, “you see, I’m afraid I have developed an addiction and, in fact, I’ve just been to see a therapist.”

“So sorry to hear it old chap. What kind of addiction, if you don’t mind talking about it?”

“Well, it was quite unnerving – Sylvia has threatened to divorce me if I don’t seek help so you can imagine the severity of my addiction – you see I had to send myself along to this so-called addiction therapist?”

I nodded, almost dreading what was coming next.

“Well, I came right out with it. ‘I’m addicted to Twitter!’ I told him and do you know he replied?”

“No Mouldy (his nickname at school), I haven’t a clue.”

“Well, he said ‘I’m sorry but I don’t follow you!”

 

And lastly…

To be Succinct

A lawyer is the only man who can write a ten thousand word document and call it a brief!

 

 

 

Without Jas

“Look,” said Mary, “Sasha has come out to greet you. She’s so happy to see you!”

Mum and I had just got out of the car and we were trying to mind the mud. We had come to visit my sister who was farm-sitting down at Rosie’s farm. Sasha reached up her paws on my leg and left muddy marks on my trousers – too late to worry about mud – and I lifted her, like a baby, from under her tiny forelegs and brought her against my chest for a kiss and cuddle. Malachi, who also was part of the welcoming committee, rubbed against our legs and hit our knees with the happy wagging of her tail.

Once inside the farmhouse kitchen I avoided looking at the spot, in the shadows under the side table, where Jas used to lie on her favourite mattress.

“Malachi lies with Sasha now,” Mary informed.

Upon hearing her name, Malachi stood between the two chairs opposite me at the table, where Mum and Mary were sitting, and they petted her.

“Is it alright to let her have part of my hot cross bun?” Mum asked.

We laughed – she had already let Malachi have the last of it.

“Rosie left me this book to read,” began Mary as she lifted a book from the table, “written by Ben Fogle. It’s called ‘Labrador'”.

My sister read aloud the short introduction to the book and finished in a stream of tears; my eyes were pricked and I don’t know about Mum – we were both silent. In a moment the familiar glossy black coat of Malachi was pressing against me, her tail wagged at my touch and her head found its way under my hand. Dear Malachi, dear Jas.

Here are some photos taken at the end of last August when we four girls picked up apples in the orchard at Larkbeare…

 

 

Lay Your Head Upon My Pillow

I’m in bed listening to the ear-worm in my head – “Lay your head upon my pillow, hold your warm and tender body close to mine…” – which is quite funny really because I am quite alone. I don’t know the time exactly but I’m guessing that it’s about six o’clock. I’ve been awake for a couple of hours, thinking and listening to this ear-worm… over and over. A train passed a while ago, lighting up the darkness behind my bedroom curtains, but not enough to illuminate the chaos at the end of my bed… our bed; I haven’t finished unpacking yet, five days on.

It’s a wonder I can hear the ear-worm over the sound of lashing rain, wind and waves… or maybe it is my subconscious trying to block out the English winter. The fog from long haul flying has cleared, almost, but still I can’t sleep through the night. I’m thinking about my last morning of waking up to sunshine – at five-thirty – and feeling the excitement of going home, also the stress of last minute packing and dread of the long haul ahead.

Chris has a bad cold and is sleeping upstairs, way upstairs at the top of the house (our bedroom is on the ground floor and there are two storeys between – “never twain shall meet”, just the train!). He doesn’t want to give me his cold and I don’t wish to receive it. But I’m all alone in bed, with Elvis Presley in my head (could be worse) and a mental picture of Sterling the cat upon my pillow… Oh, for the good times.

“For The Good Times”

Don’t look so sad, I know it’s over
But life goes on and this old world will keep on turning
Let’s just be glad we had some time to spend together
There’s no need o watch the bridges that we’re burning

Lay your head upon my pillow
Hold your warm and tender body close to mine
Hear the whisper of the raindrops fallin’ soft against the window
And make believe you love me one more time

For the Good times
I’ll get along, you’ll find another
And I’ll be here if you should find you ever need me
Don’t say a word about tomorrow or forever
There’ll be time enough for sadness when you leave me

Lay your head upon my pillow
Hold your warm and tender body close to mine
Hear the whisper of the raindrops fallin’ soft against the window
And make believe you love me one more time

For the good times
For the good times