This morning Chris brought me in a nice weak cup of tea and drew the back the bedroom curtains as usual. It was hot (as it has been recently) and he opened the window fully before joining me in bed for our ritual “cuppa” and a chat. Now our bedroom is on the ground floor of our house and you may remember that our house is built into the cliff just above the seawall; you may remember also that, at present, the seawall is closed to the public while re-construction work is being carried out on the seawall after the damage from the February storms.

Just as Chris sat down on the bed we heard a voice from the seawall below us.

“Stop p**ing against the wall!” a man shouted.

“Did you hear that?” I asked Chris (well, he is a tad deaf).

“Yes,” he answered (slightly unsure, I thought).

“Did he say, ‘Stop p**ing against the wall’? Did I hear right?”

“Surely he said, ‘Stop leaning against the wall'”, Chris replied.

We didn’t have to ponder long over it because the same rather high-pitched voice, like the actor Steven Seagal (not seagull, which might have been apt), shouted again, this time even louder:

“Stop p**ing against the wall!”

There was no mistaking it this time and Chris and I looked at each other and laughed.

“Well, one thing is for sure,” laughed Chris, “we won’t be clamouring to the window to look down and see the outrageous behaviour!”