Not wishing to sound too much of a show-off, these days we are a three loo family (well, it is a big house). I know that might sound a bit over the top when there are only the two of us left at home but you can’t be too clean – can you? No, seriously, Chris has built a self-contained guest suite on the third floor, and very nice it is – the best rooms in the house and with the finest views of the sea. Chris completed all the finishing touches whilst I was away these past three months in Australia.

Having finished the guest suite, Chris continued his quest for making our home “ideal” by turning his attention to the old loo, which faced the wrong way (too complicated to explain in a short blog post). Suffice to say, the room was in great need of renovation. Yesterday, upon my arrival home, I was thrilled to see the new, improved loo, facing the correct way and surrounded in lovely shiny tiles and new flooring.

“All it needs is a new door,” said Chris, “as the old one had to come off because of the sunken floor.”

“All the better to admire it without a door in the way,” I said, standing in the doorway – and I was transfixed for several minutes by the beauty of Chris’s creation.

This morning Chris and I awoke at six-thirty – a little later than my Australian norm of four o’clock (only joking – usually about five o’clock) – and Chris beat me to our regular bathroom on the first floor. Desperate for the loo, I arrived outside the open door and saw Chris had already begun his ablutions and slathered his face with shaving foam.

“Sorry,” he smiled victoriously, “but you have a choice of two other loos. You could even use the new loo without the door… the public loo!”

Now you may think I’m a bit of a show-off because I took Chris’s advice and christened the public loo, but, then again, there was no-one to see because there are only the two of us…